This week, I received a heartfelt letter from Shelly, a brave woman inspired to dip her toe back into the dating world after reading Love is Crystal Clear. Henri’s story resonated with her, giving her the courage to explore online dating despite past heartbreak. Let’s dive into her journey and explore the challenges of finding love in the digital age.
The Landscape of Online Dating
Match.com paved the way for modern dating apps, attracting thousands of users every month. Now, the options are endless—swipe left, swipe right, niche platforms, and more! With so many choices, it’s no wonder people feel overwhelmed.
If you’ve tried online dating, did you meet your match or feel turned off by unsolicited “pics” flooding your inbox? Which platform do you recommend?
Shelly’s Letter
Shelly shared her experience as a 50-something single mom who’s ready to date after heartbreak and betrayal. Despite the courage it took to re-enter the dating world, she’s encountering an uncomfortable trend: men asking for photos of her body before they even get to know her.
She writes:
“I’ve been chatting with several men who seem interested, but they ask for body photos. It makes me uncomfortable because my self-esteem is already low. What if they reject me? Some men even send explicit pictures and expect the same in return. Is this normal? Is there a better way to find love?”
My Advice to Shelly—and Anyone Like Her
First, Shelly, you’re an inspiration. It takes strength to move forward after difficult relationships. Let me remind you: your worth isn’t determined by anyone else’s opinion. You’re already amazing, and time is most definitely not running out—you’re in your prime!
Here’s my advice:
- Set Boundaries and Prioritize Safety
You deserve respect. Avoid anyone who pressures you for photos or crosses your boundaries. Genuine connections don’t start with requests for intimate pictures. - Focus on Connection, Communication, and Chemistry
Great relationships stem from these three pillars. Build trust through conversation before meeting, and always choose a safe, public place for first dates. - Don’t Settle for Less
As for explicit photos (aka “cock shots”), let’s be real: even the world’s most impressive one doesn’t guarantee a fulfilling relationship. Look for someone who values deeper connections. - Protect Your Energy
If you’re still healing, take it slow. Online dating can be a fantastic way to meet new people, but not everyone is looking for the same thing. Avoid those who only want a hookup if you’re seeking a serious relationship.
Let’s Discuss
Have you experienced similar challenges with online dating? How do you navigate the sometimes murky waters of digital romance? Share your stories and tips in the comments below!
Shelly, you’re not alone in this journey. Here’s to finding a love that lifts you up and a partner who sees you for the incredible person you are. ❤️